ChaosI was contemplating this morning why one little ridiculious thing happens after another w/ me lately. Strange, odd, quirky annoying things.
I have decided that I have manifested it. For whatever reason, perhaps I want a break from the chaos of my mind and these are distractions that let me focus my upset and saddness and emotions into something more legitimate and away from the other issues of not getting along w/ my husband and feeling s/w bored and unfulfilled by life in general right now.
I notice how my husband will get sick or make up some mysterious disease whenever he is anxious or depressed just so he can have a 'real' reason to rest.
Perhaps I too want a rest from the chaos and something to detract my focus. But I am tiring of the chaos as well now.
I guess I just need to get my shit together.
There is a taoist saying 'from chaos great things happen'... well, I'm hoping that is true.
I'm going to quit focusing on the poor me things I am upset about (b/c I know I am trully blessed) and try to create some joy myself, like I used to, once upon a time. Hopefully my hubby will follow or I will just ignore his moods and try to not let it affect me so strongly.